Who Carved it Best?

Every year Husband and I carve a pumpkin for Halloween. Most times it turns into a pumpkin carving competition. In fact, most activities Husband and I do together turn into competitions. This year we picked our perfect pumpkins from Gentry Farm and we carved them while catching up on missed episodes of Dancing With the Stars and eating homemade butternut squash soup. We’re a wild couple, I know.

MY pumpkin
MY pumpkin

We made sure to save and separate the seeds because I LOVE roasted pumpkin seeds.


Duckie doesn’t understand the word “no” yet… We tried to shoo her away from the pumpkin guts, but at some point we gave up and assumed she would taste the pumpkin and decide not to eat it. We were very wrong. I guess pumpkin can’t hurt cats, right?


After cleaning, drying off the seeds (and sleeping for 8 hours…seeds take a long time to dry!), I roasted them. I tossed them in olive oil, salt and pepper and baked them at 400 degrees for about 15 minutes.

IMG_20131004_074130 IMG_20131004_074725

Now for the grand finale…our pumpkins!


Mine is clearly the crooked eyed Minnie Mouse and Husband’s is from the video game Minecraft.

So, what do you think? Who won?

Hint: Me


P.S. You have exactly 90 minutes left to win a free Mokuyobi Thread Bedford Bag, it’s so easy! Just do it already!

It’s Possible


It’s been a while since I have discussed my anxiety because my anxiety has improved so much since I began my medication and healthy habits. I still deal with it daily, but it doesn’t seem as tremendous as it used to feel. So, I’ve been able to focus more on my daily life, travels, and events. I feel guilty though, because I started this blog to bring more awareness to anxiety and mental illness, and I have left it to the wayside lately.

The tragedy in Boston today reminded me of the anxiety and panic attacks I faced as a child. As an adult my panic attacks occur when I am compulsively thinking I am going to die of a terrible disease or when there are major scary changes happening in my life. As child though, they happened when others died and when major scary changes happened in the world.

I was an extremely sensitive child (okay fine…I’m still pretty sensitive), and I couldn’t help but put myself in everyone else’s shoes. If I heard of any tragic story…cancer, death, Oklahoma bombing, the book of Revelations, a sick dog, Princess Di, divorce, etc…I couldn’t handle it.

At night, I would dwell and dwell over the stories I overheard on the news or from the grown-ups around me. I began by crying for the people in the situation. Then, crying because I imagined myself in their position. Eventually, panicked because I had no control and no way to help anyone who was suffering.

I remember the Oklahoma bombing so clearly and I was only 10 years old. What I remember about this tragedy are the stories of the children, and the parents who lost their children. I couldn’t believe such a horrible thing could happen, and I felt heartbroken for those families because I imagined my own parents losing me. I panicked at night because I believed this would just keep happening.

When I learned about the book of Revelations in church (and through a weird brochure some radicals were handing out in the K-Mart parking lot) I had panic attacks for years. I thought the world was ending everyday. I panicked at night because I thought I’d never graduate, have a first kiss, get married, have kids, or have a chance to change the world. I had the most anxiety over my friends. I thought everyone was going to hell and it was my job to save them. At night I drove myself crazy thinking What if they don’t listen? Don’t believe? What if I can’t tell EVERYONE I know about Jesus and the end of times?! What about the kids in Africa!?!?! What about the kids who are raised Buddhist? How can I save EVERYONE!?!?! This isn’t fair.

I even stressed over much smaller things. If I saw a dog on the side of the road that had been hit by a car, I would dwell over the fact that his owners lost their pet. I would create an entire family in my mind and imagine how the little kids must feel when they find out what happened to their dog. By the time I got home, I had imagined a name for the dog, his owners, and their lives together. I now realize my compulsive thoughts started a very long time ago.

There seemed to be something tragic happening everyday and the little girl-me had a lot of trouble handling the world around her. Being extremely sensitive and sympathetic towards other people is a big reason for this, but I obviously suffered from anxiety and panic attacks for the majority of my life. Eventually I learned to deal with a lot of life’s major challenges, but more importantly I learned that I have an illness that can be helped, and I got help.

I wonder how many children in today’s society suffer with the same issues…and what kind of help is available for them.

Today, I cried. Of course. I thought about the fear the runners most have felt. Then the fear their friends and family must have felt. I put myself in their shoes and thought about them all afternoon. I have thought a lot about the people affected in Boston today, but I also carried on. I finished the day. I clapped along with DWTS, and I’ll go to sleep tonight without crying and without having a panic attack.

There is a happy medium. It is possible to be sensitive and not a mess. It is possible to have feelings, be on medication, and not be a zombie. Whatever you might be going through, remember that it can get better, you can get help, and things can improve. It is possible.


Top Ten Monday

Last night, I write out a list of everything I planned to get done today, starting with waking up at 6:30am.

HAHAHAHAHA! Yeah, I fell asleep at 2am while watching TV on the couch and did not get up anywhere close to 6:30. That’s okay though…I’m forgiving myself because it was my only day off this week, and I still managed to do almost everything on my to-do list. Booyah!

You know I love my Top Ten’s, so here’s my Top Ten Fav Moments of My Monday:

1. It was 70 degrees out and I wore a tank top! Hallelujah!

2. I did an old “Inhale” Steve Ross yoga workout and heard “Stomp” by Kirk Franklin. Talk about a flash back!

3. Found proof that it is actually spring.



4. Had a wonderful and long conversation with one of my closest friends.

5. Grocery shopped and made dinner all by myself.

6. Heard from Husband, and the house inspection seemed to go well!

7. Watched DTWS and oh my…I got teary-eyed four times! Grant it…it’s an emotional time of the month for me.

8. Gave myself a spring mani/pedi.


9. Cuddled with my love pup.

10. I have plans to be in bed early and go to sleep while watching Sabrina.

All this, and still had a productive day.



It’s Fall Y’all

Ten days into the new school/work year, and I am still feeling genuinely excited and positive, even if summer’s sunny weather is quickly escaping me. My effort to “look on the bright side” of autumn is working, and I am actually eager for what fall is bringing my way. In honor of fall, and my determination to embrace it, I’ve made another top 10 list!

My Top Ten Reasons to LOVE Fall:

1. Starbuck’s Pumpkin Spice Lattes

I’ll take mine with soy and ice please.

2. Foliage

The pile of leaves I found on my walk the other day.
What the park will look like very soon!

I CANNOT wait when all the leaves in Central Park turn to Orange, Yellow, and Red!

3. Tea

Husband discovered an AWESOME vegan tea cafe the other night!!!
….how pretentious did that just sound?

I’m trying really hard to love tea more and I already like tea a lot, but coffee is obviously my first love. I think Autumn will be a great time for me and tea to build a stronger relationship.

4. Evening and early morning walks in the park

I took Belle to the Park at 7 this morning for off-the-leash time with about a thousand other dogs, so fun! And, so much fur, slobber, and barking!
This is from our walk in the park yesterday evening.

The weather here is already perfect. 75 degrees has been our average, and even though it’s not great weather for the beach, it’s still great weather to be outside.

5. Sweatpants

My favorite sweatpants

I am lucky enough that I get to wear workout clothes to work virtually everyday, but the summer is just too hot for my yoga pants in sweatpants. Enter:  FALL, and it’s time to breakout my comfy baggy sweats!

6. Boots

Did I mention my birthday is coming up…in just a few short months…?

7. Soup and Chili

Fall time is when it’s okay to nix the salads and start eating comfort food again. I cannot wait for our first big pot of chili. After all, it’s one of the only things I make well!

8. New TV Season Begins!

Who’s excited for the new seasons of Dexter, Dancing With The Stars, Modern Family, Glee, and The Office!?!?!?!

9. Lots and lots of holidays

Belle’s Halloween costume from last year

Halloween, Husband’s Birthday, MY BIRTHDAY, Thanksgiving, AND Black Friday, I love having a reason to celebrate and dress in costumes! Not to mention pumpkin carving, trick-or-treating, presents, shopping, lots of food, parties, and time off work.

10. Shopping

Fall is definitely the most popular shopping time of the year. Besides all the holiday shopping, there’s the back-to-school shopping, and the fact that all the new Fall and Winter lines come out.

I hope everyone is enjoying this beautiful season!*


*To be honest, I had a really hard time making my top 10! As much as I am trying to be excited, I still miss my summer!

I’m famous, I think

Husband and I  were featured on Disney’s Fairy Tale Honeymoon and Wedding Ever After Blog.  Their blog has a section featuring Real Weddings and Husband and I were chosen as a “real couple” and were apparently interesting enough to get our own post. Woohoo!

You can read all about us here! Really…just click right here. This makes me famous, right?! Famous enough to meet Ellen?!? Or join the cast of Dancing With The Stars?!?! Be honest.

I guess I lied the other day…I know I said I posted my last wedding post, but how can I not share this exciting news!?!?

My only concern is that Disney calls us an “eccentric couple” in their story…. I’m sure they meant to say fun and attractive.

I’ll let you know when we get our book deal.